So, you decided to check out a local garage sale, and you got there just as they were closing up. There’s not much left, except for some old exercise equipment and some stuffed animals. But in the back, you see It. An Object that seems so strange, yet so compelling. You just have to have it. Oddly, when you ask the guy about the price, he seems surprised to see it. He’s not sure how it got there. He’s never seen it before. But if you want it, you can have it for a buck. Naturally, you’re suspicious, and that’s why you aren’t surprised when, later on, it starts whispering dark secrets into your ear.

When objects start speaking to you, and they aren’t made by Apple, you’re probably in trouble. Rhyming magic mirrors have a pretty good history, and there are a few talking swords out there, but generally they’re bad news. When you try to get rid of the object, and it mysteriously appears in your room or your pocket. That’s a sure sign that things are about to get sticky. Since you’re genre-savvy, you’re probably aware that this little trinket or doodad is going to drive the plot of your misadventures for the foreseeable future, so I say roll with it. Go find yourself an expert in the object’s subject matter (this will almost certainly be an old man in a library, but it might be a fun character actor of any age). Anyway, good luck breaking that curse. Here’s hoping you get a decent love interest out of the deal. Sassy, ideally.

For my part, my soul has been cursed to wander the Interwebs until I have five-score “Likes” for this comic…